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Watch Your Ass!

Tuesday, January 3, 2006
Phil Groom, St Matthew's Church, writes:
Welcome to Yiewsley - but watch your ass! Quite literally, your ass. Ours went walkabouts, along with the ox. The ox came home, but the ass is still out there somewhere.

Crib SceneEvery year St Matthew's has a Christmas nativity crib scene set up inside the church. But the Christmas story is about a homeless refugee: there was no room for Jesus inside. So this Christmas members of the Mission and Outreach Committee set up a crib scene outside, shown here on the right, complete with shepherds, straw, ox and ass.

St Matthew's is right out there on Yiewsley High Street, opposite Woolworths. There's always lots of glitz and glamour in the run up to Christmas, but there's usually very little to remind people of what Christmas is about. The new crib scene, illuminated in the evenings until midnight, changed that and we've received a lot of positive feedback, with a lot of people stopping to take a good look.

Unfortunately, at some point between Christmas and New Year, someone decided they wanted to take more than a good look and took the ass (pictured left) and the ox.
The ass that went astray
The ox came home after being found grazing on top of a bus shelter. But we're still looking out for our ass. If you've got him or know who's holding him, please bring him back. The Innkeeper's fairly frantic over the loss and despite promises of gold, frankincense and myrhh, he's still worried. "The gold and stuff all belongs to Jesus," he said, "and he's gonna need it when Herod gets wind of this story."

The theft has been reported and local police are on the lookout for anyone with a misplaced ass.

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